


Troll system sends Harry back to the past

by Death_Wand



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Age Regression/De-Aging, Attempt at Humor, Demon Harry Potter, Demons, F/M, Gamer!Harry Potter, Good Petunia Dursley, Half Demon Harry Potter, Harry Potter hates the system, Harry is a Little Shit, Humor, M/M, Parody, Time Travel, Troll Fic, Wrong Boy-Who-Lived (Harry Potter), Wrong Prophecy, harry hates his life, life hates Harry back, rewinding time
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-19 18:53:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,962
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19978852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Death_Wand/pseuds/Death_Wand
Summary: [Due to an error in the cosmic making of the multiverse theory, a remake was initiated. Please wait while the system starts the reboot.]Or, Harry died peacefully, but death... is just the beginning.





	Troll system sends Harry back to the past

When Harry closed his eyes that day, he was prepared to die. He had made peace with the world, and he had nothing left to do. The boy who lived was truly, completely ready to let go of life and go to the next great adventure.

[Dear customer, please state your name.]

Harry blinked at the voice in his head, shrugging at the mechanical pitch, but not seeing anything wrong with an automated death system, he clearly said his name. "Harry Potter."

[User name is now: Harry Potter. Confirm?]

“Yes.”

The system let out a loud *ping* and the words ‘Harry Potter’ appeared above Harry’s head in elegant green letters.

[Scanning]

[10%]

[20%]

[30%]

[40%]

[50%]

[60%]

[70%]

[80%]

[90%]

[100%]

[Scanning complete.]

[Anomaly detected. Error number #1047 – story line divergence. Error number #47971 – incorrect prophecy detected.]

[Initiating first update. Initiating net connectivity. Initiating patching.]

[Update is in process. Please wait while the system gets online.]

[System is online. Update finished. Patching complete. Story-line updated.]

[Due to an error a remake was initiated. Please wait while the system starts the reboot.]

A very confused and cute customer had no idea what the voice just said. He tried asking, but the system was already starting the process of rewinding time back to when the anomaly in the multiverse occurred.

[Reboot started.]

A large blue line started getting filled with light grey squares, but Harry had never seen a portable cellphone before and the sight looked alien and strange to the magic user.

[Time coordinates located. Rewinding time.]

Around the confused wizard, the world started going backwards. People and scenery flowed in reverse, until Harry found himself standing in the middle of nowhere. His house, the one he built with his own hands, was nowhere to be found.

[Process complete. Thank you for your patience.]

[Secondary purpose detected. Age regression will start in 3, 2, 1.]

Harry cried in alarm when his body started shrinking. He was growing smaller, becoming more child-like and even more adorable. His green eyes stopped seeing clearly, the potion that corrected his vision no longer in effect, and his clothes slipped – they’re so big now compared to his child-self.

[Data: …]

[Harry Potter. Age 11. Male. Current situation – wizard ancestry: half-blood (not supposed to know), demon ancestry: unknown. Living with Vernon and Petunia Dursley.]

[Changing equipment.]

[Current clothes: Dudley’s castoffs. Dirty glasses. Shoes.]

[The system wishes you good luck on your quest to defeat the demon King. Farther information will be available as you’ll progress.]

[The system is very sorry for the inconvenience. Please rate us fairly.]

A popup with five empty stars appeared next to Harry, as if begging him for scraps. Harry’s right eye twitched.

‘What is this?’ The boy who lived thought darkly. His lips jerked down in irritation as he started coming to terms with what the system kept saying.

The words ‘rewinding time’ popped up in his memory, the age ’11 years old’ did as well and all Harry could do was fume silently.

What about death being the great grand adventure? What about meeting his loved ones again?

This whole situation is shitty. “I was ready to die, ***m it!” 

The seemingly cute little boy, looked around and saw that he was standing just across his childhood ‘home’.

This was hell. Was he sent to hell? Because this was obviously some kind of punishment. Harry didn’t know why he’ll be sent to hell, but the evidence talked for itself. This was his worst nightmare come true.

Harry Potter cursed. _Loudly_.

A few neighbors turned to look with a disapproving stare, but no one dared approach the little troublemaker.

By this point in time Harry Potter is already well known in those parts as a good for nothing, ungrateful boy. A criminal in the making.

Poor, _poor_ Dursleys. How sad that such a good family had to deal with such a bad apple, thought the neighbors.

Well, Harry didn’t like those neighbors much either. They were blind, spiteful and little minded sheep that couldn’t think for themselves. The _worst_ kind of human beings.

The boy who lived glared at the grownups hatefully, but the they weren’t even looking so they missed the impressive look adoring Harry's face. Truly, it was a shame.

“Yeah, well, I didn’t agree to this remake.” Harry sneered and crossed his arms across his chest. The boy was in a dreadful mood.

[Dear customer this system regretfully informs you that this decision is out of your control.]

“Still, you need me to take care of this demon thing, and I won’t do it. You have to pick someone else.” Harry stood his ground.

[Gathering data…]

[Four possible solutions detected.]

[Implementing reward and punishment method.]

“What…?”

[Clarifying – this customer will start with 100 points. Cooperating with the system will award you points, and going against the system will reduce your points.]

[Extra information - You may shop for perks using your points. Massive reduction in points for bad behavior will result in punishment.]

Harry frowned.

“You can’t do this!” The boy fumed, “I’ve done enough! I fought a dark lord, battled dragons, faced hundreds of dementors! Why do I have to redo everything?!”

[Answer - Error number #1047 – story line divergence. Error number #47971 – incorrect prophecy found.]

“WHAT DOES THAT BLOODY MEANS?!” Harry huffed and puffed, his glasses sat crocked on the top of his button-nose and his eyes looked half-crazed.

[Answer – Error number #1047 – story line divergence. Error number #47971 – incorrect prophecy found.]

“ARGGG!”

Harry gripped his head and started pacing back and forth, “story line divergence? What story line divergence?!”

[Answer – Harry Potter is not the boy who lived.]

“Wait, what?!” Harry screamed “are you bloody telling me, are you telling me that my whole life…” Harry took a deep breath and tried to calm his rapidly beating heart, “my whole life was a lie?”

[This is correct.]

“No, that can’t be.” Harry shook his head and continued pacing.

[Would this costumer like a summary of the order of the events?]

“Yes. This costumer would very much like to hear the right order of events. Come on, hit me!” Harry hissed angrily.

[Processing…]

[Data scan complete.]

[Harry Potter is the first-born son of James Potter and Lily Potter nee Evens. At the age of one and a half, the Potter family died in a car accident, leaving Harry the sole survivor. The accident left a uniquely shaped scar on the top of the babe’s forehead.]

[Orphaned, little Harry was given to his aunt and uncle for safe keeping.]

“Wait a moment! What about Sirius?! Shouldn’t he be the one taking custody instead of the Dursleys?!” Harry protested.

If Voldemort never came after Harry, that could only mean that Peter never betrayed the Potters, and Sirius was never framed for betraying them. Shouldn’t Sirius be the one taking care of Harry since he’s free?

[To access this information, you may shop the ‘what happened to Sirius?’ perk. Would you like to proceed?]

Harry pushes for a second, unsure and untrusting, but the need to know about his godfather’s fate far exceeds any doubts and worries.

“Do I have enough points?”

[Affirmative.]

“So, yeah. I want to know.” Harry answers.

*Ding*

[Thank you for shopping. This system hopes you’ll like the perk!]

[You have now bought the ‘what happened to Sirius?’ perk.]

[-20 points.]

[You now have 80 points remaining.]

[Warning! You are now under 100 points.]

[Punishment selected. Punishment will start soon.]

“Well, s***!”

Harry suddenly fell to the ground as his body was hit with something as bad as the Crucio curse.

His skin felt like it was melting, and his inside like they were boiling. His face burned. The pain was intense, sudden, and unforgiving.

Harry gritted his teeth and endured.

A few seconds later, the pain stopped, leaving Harry panting and twitching. The boy was shaking badly, and he couldn’t get up.

“Ouch…” Harry cried pitifully, “everything hurts. Stupid system.”

[Dear customer, would you like to hear about Sirius Black now?] ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

“Yes, damn it!”

[To end the war, Sirius Black turned to the darker books in his ancestral home. There, he found a record speaking of powerful beings from another dimension.]

[Not long after, something contacts Sirius Black in his dreams and proposes a deal. It promises to help stop Voldemort if Sirius creates a rift that allows it passage to the human world.]

[Sirius Black disappeared on Hallowe’en night, 1981 while trying to create a rift between the human world and the third dimension.]

Sirius is gone.

Even if he’s in the past, Harry’s luck stays rotten, and he can’t get to live with his godfather. Typical Harry Potter luck right there. He almost snorts at the thought. Instead, he takes a few deep breaths and tries to think about the bright side. Sirius wouldn't want him to be sad. 

It's not like the guy is Harry's original Sirius anyway, so even if the man had been here, it wouldn't be the same. Harry was mature enough to admit that he got carried away previously. He didn't think.

But, even if this world's Sirius wasn't the original, Harry hated the thought that anything bad happened to the man. This Sirius was gone, but was he dead?

Harry frowned in thought and finally decided to asked the system, “I get that Sirius isn't here anymore, but he's alive, right?” 

[Affirmative.]

Harry sighed in relief. Missing is not the same as dead. If he's missing, then Harry can go and get him. He could save him. “Good.” Harry crossed his hand across his chest, “so what now? What am I supposed to do?”

[…]

“Ho, _now_ you’re keeping quiet.” Harry grunted in disdain, “well, since I’m in Surrey, should I pay a visit the Dursleys?”

The system was silent, so Harry decided to do as he wished. Usually, Harry would never go ten feet near the Dursleys. They were narcissistic, egotistic, and frankly, he didn’t want anything to do with them. They loved beating him up when he was a kid, and the moment he was old enough to leave, he did. Harry never looked back.

It was three years later that uncle Vernon died of a heart attack. Petunia followed her husband half a year later due to a car accident.

Dudley was fine. He mourned for his parents for a long time, but in the end, the boy ended up better for it. Harry saw him a year after the funeral.

Dudley wrote a letter telling him of Petunia and Vernon's passing. He invited him to visit even.

When he met Dudley, Harry was dumbfounded by the change. Dudley was no longer that fat little pig-like child that couldn’t stop complaining. He was thinner and less of a pain in the ass. If Harry had to describe him, he'd say that Dudley looked more like their grandfather now and less like a mini Vernon, which helped the boy who lived to set aside his hate for the grown man.

Despite all that, now that Harry was eleven years old again, so was his cousin. All of the man's progress was lost. Harry really felt bad for him.

Not that Harry was any better. He had no money, no wand, and no way to go to Diagon Alley. He couldn't even drink legally. _'Merlin's saggy balls.'_ This was going to kill him.

And how exactly was he supposed to reach Diagon Alley without stealing money? He was practically stranded here! He had nothing but the clothes on his body and no freaking idea about how different this world was from his last one.

It was apparent that his last world and this one wasn't one and the same. His first clue was that thing with the demons. As far as Harry knew, demons weren't a thing where he came from. Second, was what happened to Sirius. His godfather was locked up in Azkaban, not missing.

It was a different world. _Bloody hell._ He was in a different world! An error in the cosmic making of the multiverse _his ASS!_ This was more like being tossed into a bad-fan made imitation of his original world. _Fucking stupid-_

Now that he thought about it going back to the Dursleys was his only option, wasn't it? There was nothing else he could do at the moment. So, Harry made his way to the Dursleys’ home and opened the door with a _loud_ bang.

The sound startled the people inside, and soon, Harry was surrounded. Uncle Vernon came from the living room, his aunt from the bedroom and Dudley – surprise, surprise – made his way from the kitchen.

Seeing all of them again was like a punch in Harry's gut. The hate that he thought he had left behind came back in full force and instead of acting like a decent human being, he channeled Snape and his ever-lasting hate to everything Potter. Only, Harry did it with flair. 

“Did you miss me? Admit it, you missed me!” Harry smiled at his so-called family and there was nothing positive or happy about the smile. It and what he said was for the sole purpose of annoying his uncle, who Harry knew would lash out. Uncle Vernon never had a good temper.

Petunia looked like she swallowed a lemon, so Harry felt like he was doing a good job. Dudley looked confused, but not overly so. It was bringing back memories. 

“BOY, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!” 

Harry wasn't sure. You could argue that he didn't think at all. There wasn't a reason why he needed to lash-out. Normally he wouldn't, but Harry was forced to interact with his family ( _not_ his family). 

There wasn't any other choice. He tried apparating to Diagon Alley the moment he saw the house, but his magic wouldn't do as he wished. 

“Dad, I almost had a heart attack! You’ve got to punish the freak!” Dudley demanded. The pig-like boy shot a nasty glare in Harry's direction that went completely ignored.

“My poor baby, are you OK?” Petunia then turned toward the black-haired boy and hissed angrily, “ _you_!”

“ _Me_!” Harry agreed, “In the flesh!”

It was nice to see that even in a different world the Dursleys remained as evil as he remembered them. 

“I should spank you for your behavior. You, ungrateful little imp!” Aunt Petunia took a step closer with a stormy expression. It was something the original aunt Petunia would say frequently, so Harry just shrugged his shoulders and glared at her. 

“Nice to see you again too aunt."

Harry almost sneered, but that would look awful on his face, he knew. Best leave that for Malfoy. At least when he did it, the expression looked like it belonged.

This was a bad decision. Harry never lived on the streets, but maybe it was time to give it a try. He needed to get out of here. 

“Mom! The freak is acting weird again.”

Harry zeroed in on Dudley and grinned wickedly, “Like you're one to talk!” He stopped himself from saying anything more. He needed to get himself under control.

“BOY YOU STOP THIS NONSENSE RIGHT NOW!”

“What uncle? I’m afraid I couldn’t hear you. Could you possibly scream louder?” Harry egged the larger male. Why? God, he had no idea. 

He was just so exhausted and tired of everyone thinking they could manipulate him to do what they wanted. He wasn't a doll. He couldn't deal with-

“THAT’S IT! I’M GOING TO KILL HIM!” Vernon was ready to burst.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you~” Harry threatened and his magic boiled underneath his skin. _'Like hell, I'm just going to sit here and let you beat me. No more.'_

“Mom! Do something!”

“EVERYONE QUIET!” Aunt Petunia screamed and glared at the three males. “With me. Now.” She said crisply and led Harry to the garden.

Harry closed his eyes and tried to calm himself. His magic stayed close as if watching out for the wizard. 

He could refuse, but Harry needed to- no, he had to talk with this woman. If nothing else, to arrange his thoughts in some semblance of order. With that final thought in mind, Harry followed his aunt.

Petunia was stronger than she looked. Harry had to muse as her boney hand almost crushed his smaller, child-like arm. 

The woman walked away from her husband and child with rapid, sharp movements and pulled the boy with her. It was maddening that he looked bored and uninterested. Petunia swore she was going to punish the ungrateful little freak the moment whatever this was, was over.

"Now, you're going to tell me what the bloody hell got into you, or Vernon is going to be the least of your troubles!" Petunia glared at him and let go of his arm abruptly. 

Harry noted how she _cleaned her hand_ on her clothes soon after. It made him feel filthy. "God, you're awful, I really hope you know that." 

"Now!"

Harry glared at her, and his anger boiled under. She wanted to know, did she? _Fine_ , he'll tell her. He will take away the veil that covered her eyes and shove it up her ass. 

Harry crossed his arms across his chest. His right arm was still aching, "fine. To make long things short: I know I'm a wizard. My father was a wizard and that my mother was a witch. I've known for a while now."

Harry smiled mockingly at the horrified look adoring his dear aunt, "yes, that right. _Magic_." He nodded understandingly, "as in spells and charms, curses and whatnot." 

"Magic isn't real!" Petunia insisted, but as white, as she was, it wasn't convincing. 

"Yeah, yeah. Sure it doesn't." 

Harry snorted. It was almost surreal how far his aunt was prepared to take the lie. "Just because you don't like magic, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist." 

Aunt Petunia progressively got redder and redder, and she looked like she wanted to take Harry and wash his mouth with soap. 

"MAGIC ISN'T REAL!" 

Just how much did she hate magic? 

Harry took a step back. "Wow, tune it down a bit. Bloody hell. You ruined my ears." 

"I won't have you talking about such nonsense in my house." Petunia spits hatefully, and her face looks pinched.

"I wouldn't be at your house if I could help it. I hate it." Harry seethed. "I hate _you_."

Petunia hissed like an angry tiger. Her entire being looked ready to murder the boy, but she stopped herself, "You _dare_?" 

"I can do more than dare, I can also threaten. Would you like me to?" The boy asked, and his green eyes glittered in the light like two tiny blades.

"That's it! No food for you! You ungrateful little rascal! We took you in from the goodness of our heart, and all we ever got from you is grief!" Petunia sneered "You are _nothing_ like my sister!"

Ok, what?

Petunia never talked about her sister before in her life. _What the hell?!_

Harry took a second to look at things. This was a world where James and Lily really died in a car crash. A world where Voldemort didn't target them. Could this be a world where Lily and Petunia... reconciled?

'But, if that was the truth, why did they react to me like that?'

[Would you like to purchase the 'Harry Potter - Afterwards' Pack?]

_'You shitty little-'_

_'Let me guess. Am I supposed to be this really dickish kid that always makes trouble for others? Am I a mini-riddle?! Oh my god, I am, am I?!'_

Harry gave his aunt another look and hated to admit that there might be some truth to it. but unlike Riddle, the original Harry of this world didn't turn harmful yet.

Bloody hell.

"I'm not my mother, you know." Harry said, "I don't know anything about her. You never bothered to tell me anything about her. Maybe it was because you never liked me. I know I was unwanted, that I was forced on you."

Petunia looked stunned at the words. 

"You might not believe it, but even if I _don't_ like you, you did take me in. I wanted you to look at me like you look at Dudley, but I know you can't. Never will." Harry said dejectedly. The sad thing was, he wasn't lying - This was something Harry never got to tell the original aunt Petunia, but he meant it.

"I won't ask you suddenly love me, because I've given up on your affection a long time ago, but at least, I don't want to come back to a house where I feel attacked all the time."

Harry wasn't even insulted when Petunia scoffed. Had it been his aunt Petunia that one day told him something like that out of the blue, he too wouldn't believe it for a second.

The original Harry Potter never talked back, like Harry never did when he was his age. He did as told. He would talk back sometimes, but never like this. 

"Just-" Harry stopped, his courage living him with frustration and defeat. His aunt will never understand. She didn't want to. So, why was he trying?

"Forget it," Harry sighed, "just give me some money and I'll be out of your hair for a very long time. Back with my _kind_." He passed a hand through his messy hair and looked away. 

"Are _you_ asking for my help. _Harry Potter?_ " 

"Yeah." He agreed, "I do."

"Ok, spill." 

Aunt Petunia crossed her hands and glared at the infuriating child. 

Harry Potter was nothing like her Dudders. Her little boy got bullied by the boy day and night, and whenever Petunia tried to do something about it, bad things happened. 

It started small. Things going missing or misplaced. It was annoying, but nothing much. When the boy got older though, things got worst. Soon, little accidents started happening. A bad day in the office, plants suddenly dying and other such things. 

The boy was evil. A freak. Petunia _knew_ magic was no good, but for her sister - the sister that died to get to her Dudder's birthday - she took the boy in and gave him a home.

Serves her right. 

Petunia didn't know what the little freak thought he was doing, lying to her like that. She wanted to know what he was planning, because if she was truthful, Petunia hated not knowing things.

Potter, the dreadful child that he is smiled at her hopefully - fake - and told her he needed to go to Diagon Alley. 

Wasn't that the place Lily went to when she turned eleven? The magic place? Petunia narrowed her eyes and looked at the demon child hatefully. 

"You want to get a wand, don't you?" She asked finally. "Well, you can't get one until you turn eleven." She informed him rather happily. 

Potter smiled and the sight itself had her hair standing high, "ho, no. Nothing like that." He said, "I don't need a wand to do magic, but I do want to visit a few shops over there." 

Petunia didn't know if the boy was lying or not, but considering their past, she had no doubt that she wasn't being told the whole truth. The boy was a manipulative little beast. If he didn't want a wand that could only mean one thing.

"So you admit it!" Petunia screeched, pointing at the bewildered child, "All those times! You ungrateful little freak! I'll show you what it means to curse Vernon and me!" 

"Wait, what?!" Harry Potter said, panicked.

Petunia almost smirked. Serves the boy right being caught in his own lie. "I know you did it. Those _nasty_ little accidents. The missing things. The snakes in the garden. I _knew_ it!"

Harry blinked at the enraged woman and silently thought to himself, _'what did I do wrong?'_

[-5 points for decreasing aunt Petunia's Love for you.]

_'Come on!'_

"No!" Harry shook his head dejectedly, "I just learned I could do it! This is why I knew magic was real!"

"You expect me to believe that?!" Aunt Petunia hissed angrily. 

"Yes, because it's the truth. Now shut up and let me finish, Ok?" Harry was at his wit's end. This was turning out to be harder than he thought. 

Petunia only huffed and glared. 

"Thank you." 

Harry took a deep breath and lied. By now, he was almost good as a lier than he was as a caster. Aunt Petunia listened, nodding at all the right moments, but listening intently. She was looking to catching him at the lie, but Harry didn't let her. He made sure to keep it vague and simple.

"And that's why I need to go to Diagon Alley." He finished.

Aunt Petunia still didn't look like she believed him, but she appeared to give him the benefit of the doubt, which was enough.

"You want me to help you get to Diagon Alley," Petunia said determinedly, "Ok, but you're going to do something for me."

"What?"

"I'm going with you. No buts, no nothing."

Harry didn't bother with a 'but' before he turned around and started walking away. In the grand scheme of things, aunt Petunia and what she wanted didn't matter one bit, and while he tried to have a better relationship with the woman, there were some things Harry felt strongly about, one such thing was total separation between the muggle world and the magical world. 

It's not something that Harry believed in when he was younger. A large part of the war against Voldyshorts was because the dark wizard was so keen on his anti-muggle policy. As someone that lived near muggles all his life, Harry felt obligated to do something to stop the dark wizard - which was one of many other more important reasons to take down old Moldyshorts. 

Back to the matter at hand, you see Harry lived a long, long life, and he was there when the muggles discovered magic and everything to do with it, such as witches and wizards. Suffice to say, Muggles and wizards did not get along. Well, they did at first, and it was awesome. It was like a confirmation that everything Harry fought for wasn't all for nothing. He was happy, but that happiness clouded his eyes and prevented him from seeing what was happening right in front of him.

Muggles, as a whole, acted so accepting. Or at least, that what it felt like to the wizarding world, but then new rules came out: restrictions, regulations, and other such laws. Suddenly, many wizards and witches found themselves without jobs. People with monetary problems sunk deeper and Harry Potter stood in the eye of the storm. What happy feeling he had before disappeared like smoke.

Things started going wrong when folks started going missing. The smarter witches and wizards fled to their hideouts - places that wouldn't be there if not for the war against Voldemort. That probably saved their lives.

Harry was hiding, but for another reason - a case went wrong. It was partly good because the bombing started not soon after, and it was only because of that, that he stayed alive. Ginny had died and so did -

Harry stopped. He wasn't going to think about it. The black-haired boy promised himself to move on. No more emo-Harry feeling sorry for himself, no matter how messed up he was. God, he wished this body wasn't ten years old because he sure felt like drinking.

"Sorry aunt Petunia, but I don't want you to come with me." He said and passed a hand through his hair. Aunt Petunia looked livid, but Harry couldn't care less.

"No, I won't allow it." Aunt Petunia said resolutely. She huffed in a repressed fury of an adult that had to deal with a difficult child. Harry instantly recognized it. Ginny used to act like that whenever James was difficult. 

Don't think about it.

"I wasn't asking. I really can't." Harry insisted in a calm voice that sent a shiver down aunt Petunia's back. She stood her ground, however, not bodging an inch. 

"I don't care. I said so before, I'll repeat it. You're ten Harry. I can't let you wander alone in some unfamiliar city!" 

It was strange how different aunt Petunia was from his aunt Petunia. This one was a decent human being that cared for her nephew's well being. His aunt Petunia would sooner throw him under the nearest bus. It made him wonder if there were other drastic changes in this re-do world. If there were Harry needed to know about them as soon as he could.

The question was, how was he going to get rid of his aunt. Before now, Harry didn't have anyone that cared enough for something like that to be an issue. He needed his freedom, damn it. What he didn't need was a worried muggle lady that happened to look like his nightmare of an aunt hovering around - what about some wandless magic? That would fix things, wouldn't it?

[Warning!]

[Dear customer, this system regrets to inform you that you don't have the wandless magic feature. Any use of wandless magic could result in an unpredictable form of underaged accidental magic.] 

[Thank you for using the system!]

Well, shit. That severally limited what Harry could do. How is he going to handle aunt Petunia?

_'I could take her with me. Get it all over with and forget any of it had ever happened.'_

[For thinking like an adult and putting past garages where they belong +10 points.]

That's it?! That's barely anything! Harry wanted a refund! 

"Well?" Aunt Petunia was looking at the boy with something unfamiliar in her eyes. She expected more of a fight out of the boy but was surprised to see him nod. 

Harry looked like that's the last thing he would like to do, but the fact that he caved this fast was ringing several alarm-bells in Petunia's mind.

[Warning!]

[Aunt Petunia now suspects you.]

This is how Petunia Dursley and Harry Potter the Wrong-Boy-Who-Lived (or so he liked to remind himself in the confines of his mind) found themselves in the middle of London:

After the talk aunt Petunia dragged Harry back to uncle Vernon and demanded that he apologized. Since Harry needed his aunt's help, he ignored his pride and did as she asked. He apologized to his uncle with a bored tone and crossed hands before turning to look at aunt Petunia to see if what he said had been enough in her eyes.

From what Harry could see, Vernon, unlike aunt Petunia, didn't seem all that different from the original uncle Vernon. He was the same short-tempered, fat, violent muggle that Harry knew. 

Aunt Petunia looked between the two and a resigned look in her eyes before rolling her eyes as if to say 'good enough.' Then, she told his uncle that she planned a short trip to London and she was taking 'the boy' with her. Harry silently objected to being called 'the boy,' but he didn't dare open his big mouth. The last thing he needed was for his aunt to change her mind.

Uncle Vernon grunted some sort of unimaginative reply before kissing his aunt goodbye. She smiled at him lovingly - _'god, why don't you kill me now!' -_ Before grabbing hold of Harry's hand and pulling him after her. The two of them drove all the way to the Leaky Cauldron silently before his aunt parked the car.

"Have you ever been to Diagon Alley before?" Harry found himself asking. He looked up at aunt Petunia with curious green eyes only to see her startled expression. _'What was so strange about what I asked?'_

Harry didn't understand that it was the fact he asked at all that surprised Petunia. She took a good, long look at the boy standing in front of her, unsure if she should say anything at all.

Harry shrugged his shoulders and sighed in disappointment. It wasn't his original aunt, but it was still aunt Petunia. Why would she share anything with him when she couldn't stand him. She still called him boy, which was a name he absolutely hated and it was clear that the two of them didn't get along. He should have kept his mouth shut.

Harry looked away from the taller woman and towards the Leaky Cauldron. He remembered that muggles can't see the shop. Their eyes would slide towards the other shops nearby. His aunt should be facing the same situation right now. 

Clearing his throat, Harry extended a small child's hand towards the older woman. He felt rather silly, but it was something that had to be done. Aunt Petunia slowly reached for his hand. When he looked she still appeared to be in a slight daze. 

"Can you see it now, aunt Petunia?" Harry pointed towards the Leaky Cauldron's entrance. 

"Y-Yes, I can." She said in a choked voice. He could feel her hand trembling in his, but Harry didn't acknowledge it. They'll both feel better if they'll ignore how touching this whole thing actually was.

For Harry, who never had anyone to care enough to take him to Diagon Alley it was almost alien to enter the Leaky Cauldron holding his aunt's hand. For aunt Petunia, who had once wished to be a part of her sister's world, this was like a stolen glimpse of a forbidden sight.

Harry covered the warm feeling in his chest with a sharp look towards all the staring wizards and witches in the shop. They didn't turn away from him and some returned an ugly sneer back, which immediately killed the pleasant atmosphere from before. 

"Since I don't have a wand yet, we'll need the bartender's help," Harry informed aunt Petunia in a hushed tone. She nodded and with all the grace of a charging bull, she walked right towards the old wizard working in the front.

Harry recognized the bartender as the same one from his first year. The one that blurted out his name and made a huge mess out of Harry's introduction to the wizarding world. 

"Hello," aunt Petunia called and asked the bartender, Tom, to help them reach Diagon Alley. The old man nodded kindly and asked a younger fella to handle it.

"Where do you want to go first?" aunt Petunia asked in a hushed voice. She fixed her dress uncomfortably. Harry looked around and noted the semi-hostile gazes of the wizards and witches around him. No wonder Aunt Petunia felt nervous. 

"First, I want to visit the bank. The wizarding world doesn't use the same currency as the normal world," Harry explained as the two walked, "after that, I want to buy some books. History books mostly. I want to know more about the war." 

"Alright," aunt Petunia agreed uneasily. "Do you know why everyone's staring at us?"

"Yeah," the former boy who lived nodded, "it's because of how we're dressed. We look out of place." 

Maybe it was because of how Harry worded it, but Petunia insisted on visiting a clothing shop first after visiting the bank. "I don't want _them_ to stare at me like that," was her main reason. Harry couldn't care less, but clothes would come in handy later, so he didn't see a reason why not.

And so, Harry's visit to the goblin bank started. Unfortunately, it started on the wrong foot thanks to his dear old aunt. 

Harry didn't warn her that the bank was run by the goblin nation, which now that he thinks about it should have been the first thing he should have told her. The second thing he should have told her was not to stare.

God, how he _hated_ dealing with the goblins. 


End file.
